Tips for Surviving the Initial Planning Stages

First and foremost welcome back! (hopefully you're back!)..If not Welcome and I hope you enjoy today's post!

Today I'll cover how to get through the initial planning stages of your wedding..because believe me it's VERY overwhelming! Feel free to post any questions or suggestions in the comments section below!

Without further ado:

1. CELEBRATE! You're engaged! Live it up! Call your family, call your friends, shout it on the streets(well maybe not in the streets, people might think you're weird) you know what I mean. Enjoy it! This is most likely one of the most exciting times of your life, take the time to celebrate and soak it up. Along with celebrating (however you may do that, parties, dinner with friends, a lazy night on the couch with your new fiancè and a bottle of champagne, etc.) take the time to just enjoy the moment before you jump into planning.

2. RELAX! After your initial celebration you'll soon realize there is A LOT to do! DON'T PANIC! First of all there is no right or wrong way to go about your planning.  I'm not going to say you have to choose a venue immediately you also do not need to set a date as soon as you get the ring.  Take your time! The dress shopping, centerpieces, decorations, color scheme, theme, and whatever else the wedding industry says are "tradition" are NOT necessities! No matter who says otherwise. Take your time and figure out what you two want your day to look like and what is and isn't important to you.  Once you establish that, it will be smooth sailing.

3.  GET ORGANIZED  For me this meant starting with a budget (I can't help it it's the Business Teacher in me...and those of you who know me know I am a budget queen!)  In order to determine what we wanted to spend, we first created a guest list to see how many people we would be feeding. This does not have to be the final draft, but it is an excellent starting point.  Once you've established your total guest count it's much easier to get an accurate idea of how much you'll be spending. Do some research about the average cost of a wedding in your area. A great resource is costofawedding.com. Type in your zip code and it will give you the average cost of a wedding in your county, and even breaks the overall cost down into major purchases (attire, invitation, rings etc.) and explains in detail what each subcategory includes.
              Start a wedding binder or get a wedding organizer. One of the best gifts that I received was from my sister Jamie last Christmas (love ya sissy!).  Its a wedding planner/organizer all in one; The Ultimate Wedding Planning Guide by Elizabeth and Alex Lunch. You can purchase this awesome guide/organizer here.
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I highly recommend this amazing book to anyone who's just starting out with their planning.  Everything from the ceremony, photography, flowers and gifts are covered. As well as a budget guide and vendor contact sheets and planning tools. I use this handy little book to keep track of what we have completed, (they provide checklists and tracking charts!..type A personality kicking in!) what we might need to work on and some of the stuff I have no idea about.  For example Reception Cards, Ceremony Cards, Rain Cards, Pew Cards...seriously?!...This awesome book breaks everything down for you and explains each aspect and what their role is on the big day.
             Along with the book, my best friend Janet (love you too <3) started a wedding binder for us...(Yes I need both, again with the type A all the way personality :P)  In the binder is where I keep all my inspiration for things we have yet to accomplish or how I imagine certain things looking; ie. centerpieces, bridesmaids' dresses, favors etc. This is also a great place to keep all your contracts, and notes/important documents from meetings and bridal shows. Which brings me to my next step.

4. ATTEND A BRIDAL SHOW  Ok, so I know I said that you shouldn't jump in too quickly but this step is really still part of step 3 and it's the easiest way to gather a lot of information in one easy convenient location especially if you're new to an area (ie. moved there for college and decided to stay, recently relocated for a job etc.) The best decision my fiancè and I made was to attend a bridal show in our area. First of all it was FREE yes FREE! This is an amazing thing considering we're talking about the wedding industry!! (most shows are, the bride can register for free and bring as many people as she likes!) We had no idea what kind of vendors were out there and what to expect from wedding service providers, so we thought this would be the best place to gather a bunch of information to get started. Now don't get me wrong the show was fun! Champagne tastings, bridal fashion shows, GREAT savings and of course FREE CAKE! I mean come on..who doesn't want free cake?! A word of advice for those considering attending a bridal show for the first time; don't be pressured to make a decision/sign a contract that day.  Many of the vendors are expecting couples to sign their life away that day. We were still a little shaky on an official date and what kind of venue we were looking for, for goodness-sakes! DON'T fall for it! It may seem like a great deal at the time and you really enjoyed that cake sample, but you need to shop around for what fits YOUR needs (and budget) best.  Take their business card and sign up to be on their e-mail/mailing list. Then thank them for their time and move along.  The first show we went to I literally had not gotten a chance to take my jacket off and we were being mauled by  a DJ chattering about what great services they provide etc. etc. And when I finally was able to get the guy to pause for two seconds, I explained that we had not established a venue/official date yet  he gave me a strange look, offered his business card and awkwardly shuffled away. It was crazy! Keep a positive attitude, enjoy the freebies, and keep your mind on what you're their to do; gather information.  Don't feel bad if the vendor is providing an amazing deal that day and you don't sign up for it.  98% of the time the vendors will run that deal for a few weeks after the show for those brides/couples that attended and signed up to be on their e-mail/contact list. You most likely will still get that amazing price without the pressure to sign that day. Many times, vendors are also flexible with their deals as well.  If you make and appointment with them before their expiration date, they may extend the offer to you once you decide to book with them. We'll talk about this in a later post about negotiations :)

5. REVIEW.  Once you have gathered information on vendors that you might want to work with, take time to sit down and review what they offer and how it works (or in some cases, doesn't work) for you.  Use your handy wedding guide to record the vendor's name, contact info, and brief description of what they do.  In your binder you can print off and keep the specific contract info, and detailed information about your vendors.  We narrowed ours down to three vendors per service.  With so many vendors to choose from it's easy to get them or the services they provide confused.  Having only three options per DJ, venue, caterer, limo service etc. makes thing much more manageable and more organized.  We organized our top three choices by price and services provided.  Don't worry if one or two of the vendors you choose is over budget right now. Once you are able to establish what you want from each vendor you will most likely be able to customize a package to fit your needs (another topic discussed in vendor negotiations.) After all this is a big day and you should be able to have whatever food or service option you want at a price you can afford. :) That sounds like a great commercial...maybe I should go into advertising... :P

Phew! I know this was A LOT to take in...but never fear I will be breaking down the important stuff in individual posts.  This was just an overview to get you started. :) If you have any specific questions as to how we went about establishing our budget, putting together a binder, or anything else you'd just like to know, feel free to leave a comment.  For those of you who are also doing your planning, if you'd like to share your input please feel free to comment as well! The more info the better!

Next up: Your Day But NOT All About You. Valuing other's opinions and input. Stay tuned!